Something Different
by Reizbar-Ookami
Summary: ONESHOT: How Anko met Iruka, and how their familial relationship came to be. And how no one is safe from it; just a tiny bit of KakaIru at the end, too.


Something Different

Anko knew there was something…_ off_ about that Umino boy. Both of his parents had died in the Kyuubi attack, and he'd returned to the academy within a week afterward. He'd been quiet the first few days, like he usually was, before he began pulling pranks and making trouble. He smiled all the time, and laughed. That's not how a person was supposed to act after losing both of their parents, ninja or not.

So she made it her mission to figure out just what the hell was wrong with him.

.-.-.-.-.-.

She was disappointed. She didn't even have to _try_ to sneak after him when he left the academy. But, on another note, she'd finally gotten to see what she wanted to see; the Umino boy had been _faking._

Anko had to admit, she felt pity when the boy's shoulders had slumped, his expression had twisted into an agonized sadness, and he'd taken out a rubber ball to throw at the wall, catch, throw again, and so on. Now, she just stood and watched, listening to the **bam-bounce-slap**, **bam-bounce-slap** of the ball as the boy continued to throw and catch. He was so used to the actions that he could just lean back, close his eyes, and move.

Iruka stopped for a moment, frowning, as he held the ball in his hand, brows furrowing together in confusion. A few moments later, however, he opened his eyes and looked around. "Who's there? You can come out. I don't bite."

Anko scowled; she'd gotten careless and as a result had gotten caught. Crossing her arms, she huffed and stepped into the light. "What?"

"…I know you. You're in my class. Mitarashi Anko, right?"

"Yeah, what's it to ya?" she asked flippantly, placing her hands on her hips as she glared at him.

He raised an eyebrow at her. "…Um… you're sort of in my house, watching me. It's kind of creepy."

"Well _excuse_ me for worrying you're some kind of emotionally stupid _freak!_" she exclaimed, blushing a little in humiliation that she'd been caught. "Besides, it's not like I was spying on you in the bathroom!"

"…You're sort of weird," he stated after a moment, then stood up and dusted his pants off. "I'm hungry. Do you want some dango? I bought too much on the way home and I don't want to throw it away."

Anko snorted and crossed her arms. "I don't _like_ dango!"

"…Have you ever even tried it?" Iruka asked, blinking at her. When she merely huffed and looked away from him, he rolled his eyes and walked over to the box on the counter. "It's just plain dango; just eat one and I'll leave you alone about it."

Remembering the sad expression on his face, she reluctantly nodded. "Okay, fine." Taking the stick of dango, she slid one of the pastel-colored balls into her mouth and began to chew. After a few seconds, she reached for another stick, sliding another ball of dango into her mouth.

Iruka smiled sweetly. "See, you just need to try new things before you decide you don't like them. That's what my mother always—" He stopped suddenly, a stricken look crossing his face.

Anko blinked at him, then offered him a small, timid smile. "…Your mother was a very smart lady then."

"Yeah. …She was," he replied, looking down at his feet.

She tried to think frantically of something to say, something that could comfort him. He was lonely, she could see that, and he was hurting—but how to help him?

Iruka jumped when she suddenly reached forward and grabbed his hands, eyes flaming in determination. "Ack! Mitarashi-chan, what—"

"Call me Anko! From now on, we're going to be best friends! I'll watch out for you and you'll watch out for me! Got it?!" She used a glare to show him just how much pain he'd be in if he refused.

He blinked for a moment, then smiled sweetly. "Okay, Anko-chan. Whatever you say."

"Don't call me 'chan!' You make me sound like a girl! I'm not a girl, I'm a ninja!" she exclaimed, blushing a little as she shoved him away.

Startled, Iruka stared at her for a few seconds before he smiled again. "Okay. Yeah. Best friends."

"Good!" She scowled at him fiercely before it began to fade, and she tapped her fingers together nervously as she looked down at her feet. "…Could I have some more dango, please?"

"Oh! Sure. I bought way too much anyway."

.-.-.-.-.-.

Anko grinned and sat down beside her friend, poking his hitai-ate playfully. "Hey, 'ruka. Heard you passed the chuunin exams!"

Iruka smiled and nodded, blushing a little and tugging self-consciously at his vest. "Yeah. D-do I look like a chuunin now?"

"Tch, not when you stutter like that," she retorted, smirking playfully. Letting it fade into a happy smile, she tilted her head inquisitively. "So, what are you going to do now? Practice for jounin exams?"

The brunet dipped his head and smiled a little, scratching the scar across his nose reflexively. "Actually, I was thinking about becoming a teacher at the academy." So saying, he closed his eyes tightly, waiting for the gale of laughter he felt was coming.

Instead, he was surprised when she clapped her hands together in delight. "Yes, I knew it! You _looove_ kids! Of course you're going to help them prepare for the joys of ninja-hood!"

"…That's not even a word," he stated after a few moments of disbelief.

Anko waved it away carelessly. "Details! My best friend's going to become an _academy teacher!_"

Iruka sighed and crossed his arms. "I'm going to have to study a lot for it, you know, memorize a lot of things. I have to take that humongous test before I can do it, and I'm going to have to study for that around missions." He frowned as her eyes lit with a determined fire. "…Anko?"

"Iruka! From now on, we're going to be study buddies!" she exclaimed, grabbing his hands. "I'll help you pass that test for sure! Got it!?"

He blinked at her in surprise, then smiled and nodded. "Okay, Anko. Whatever you say."

.-.-.-.-.-.

Anko tilted her head as looked Iruka over, scrutinizing his appearance critically, as if he had changed in some way. "…Well, you don't look like a queer," she stated finally, making him blush brightly.

"Anko-! Don't say it like that!" he exclaimed, waving his hands frantically. "Besides, just because I like guys doesn't mean I'm going to look different or anything! I'm still Iruka! I just happen to like the same gender!"

"…Yeah, whatever. I don't believe you." She blinked, suddenly looking both surprised and enlightened. "_Ooooh._ So _that's_ why you do all of that domestic stuff, like cooking and all that shit."

He scowled and rolled his eyes in exasperation. "I do that stuff because I live alone and need to eat!"

Anko snorted and waved it away. "Mooch off someone else then. It's what I do."

"…Anko, you mooch off me. If I mooched off someone else, you'd have no food and no one to feed you," he deadpanned, making her frown thoughtfully.

"Huh, I guess I never thought of that." Suddenly, her eyes lit up with a determined fire, much like that fateful day back in the academy. "Iruka! From now on, we're going to be girlfriends! We'll look out for each other when we go on dates, and when we're out drinking together, we can scope out hotties for each other!"

"…I don't like the idea of being called a girlfriend."

She frowned. "Well I can't call you my boyfriend; guys would think I'm unavailable then."

Iruka sighed, then nodded in defeat. "Okay, Anko. Whatever you say."

.-.-.-.-.-.

Anko frowned and clasped her hands together anxiously, then stepped up beside her friend and looked down at her feet. "…I heard about Nezumi-chan. I'm sorry."

Iruka raised his glassy eyes to his friend and sighed shakily. "I don't know, Anko. I never really expected to see one of my friend's names on the memorial stone. …Sort of like I never expected to see my parents' names on it. I just… I didn't think I'd lose the last of my family. Nezumi and I were never close, but she was still my cousin."

"It's okay." She reached over and grabbed his hand tightly.

Iruka didn't know what she was telling him was okay. Was it okay to be sad? Was it okay to wish Nezumi hadn't been his cousin? Was it okay to wish it had been him instead? Was it okay… to wish that he wasn't alone?

Anko gave his hand a comforting squeeze and sighed, then turned toward him and grabbed his other hand. "Iruka!"

"Eh?" He had to admit, he hadn't seen that much determination since Anko had declared that they were best friends. …Oh God, don't say that she was going to claim they were getting married.

Her smile was determined and happy, despite where they were and why they were currently there. "Iruka, from now on, we're going to be family! You'll be my brother! I'll be your sister! We're not alone anymore! Got it?!"

Iruka blinked at her in surprise, then smiled sweetly, tears forming in his eyes. "Okay, Anko. Whatever you say, oneesan."

"…Hey, that's right! I _am_ a year older than you!" she exclaimed excitedly.

…He had a very bad feeling about that.

.-.-.-.-.-.

Iruka squealed and nearly dropped the bowl he was holding as his front door was kicked open. "Oh my-! _Anko!_ You're going to break my door!" he complained, frowning.

She scowled and thrust the blond-haired brat she was supposed to be baby-sitting into the apartment, then stomped over to his cupboards to begin looking through, grumbling about something to eat. The younger boy clasped his hands behind his back and scuffed his foot over the floor, the perfect picture of remorse.

After waiting a few minutes for an explanation, Iruka scowled and pointed at the kitchen table. "_SIT!_"

Anko turned form the cupboards and sat, crossing her arms and pouting petulantly. Naruto sighed and sat down as well. He waited a few more minutes for an explanation, then growled in annoyance.

Not wanting her friend to lose his temper, the kunoichi finally sighed and looked up at him angrily. "This little brat has been letting the grocers walk all over him! Buying milk after the expiration date, buying bruised fruit, paying double what others pay for ramen, buying clothes that are too big for him because he can't 'afford' anything his size-! He wasn't even going to tell us!"

Iruka frowned and turned to look at the blond. "Naruto, is this true?"

Naruto sighed and nodded slowly. "Yeah."

"…I see." Sighing, the brunet pointed down the hall. "Naruto, why don't you go take a bath, and I'll get dinner ready. Okay?"

"'kay," the younger boy sighed, then hopped off the seat and walked to the bathroom.

Anko waited for the door to shut behind him before looking up at her friend furiously. "Just because he houses the Kyuubi-!"

"Calm down, Anko. We know now and we can take care of it." Iruka sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "We'll just have to keep a better eye on him and his expenses." He frowned when the kunoichi's eyes lit with determined fire. "Here we go again."

Grabbing the brunet's hands, she exclaimed, "Iruka! From now on, we're Naruto's protectors! We'll look after him and make sure no one takes advantage of him ever again!"

Iruka blinked at her, then sighed and nodded, smiling. "Okay, Anko. Whatever you say." He frowned suddenly. "…I think I'll just make some ramen tonight. I've got some leftover dango from going out with Genma after school today, if you want it."

She squealed and sprang for the refrigerator. "It's mine!"

.-.-.-.-.-.

Anko knew there was something… _off_ about Iruka. He was sad a lot, and when he wasn't doing anything related to school, he had little motivation, even when it came to ramen. With Naruto out training with Jiraiya, he'd been listless and… frowny. Iruka wasn't meant to be frowny. When she found out the reason was because of something Kakashi had said, she'd gone looking for the copy-nin. …Probably causing him some excruciating pain.

Iruka blinked as he saw a black and silver blur fly over him before it hit the wall, then fell down to land on the floor. "…Anko? What did you just throw?"

"_Hatake!_" the purple-haired woman shouted angrily, stomping over to the man trying desperately to form hand seals to get away—but his hands were currently tied together with a piece of chakra-absorbing rope.

The chuunin blinked again, then scowled and sat up straight. "_Anko!_ You promised you wouldn't go after him—"

Forcing the silver-haired man to his feet and over to her friend, she scowled and pulled out a kunai. "Iruka! From now on, you and Kakashi are dating! I'm tired of you guys flirting and then hurting each other's feelings! It's really starting to piss me off!"

Iruka wondered vaguely if there was a way out of this, but he knew by experience that Anko was a formidable opponent when she wanted a fact to be true. So, sighing, he raised his hands in defeat. "Okay, Anko. Whatever you say."

"Good!" Anko thrust the copy-nin away and growled, then stomped toward the door. "You guys better be out on a date by the time I get back from getting dango!" And then the door slammed shut.

The brunet sighed and untied the jounin's hands quickly. "Come on. If people don't see us together for at least an hour after this, Anko will have both of our heads. I like my head. I need it to live."

"From _what_ did she get flirting from!?" Kakashi exclaimed, following him out the door.

Iruka sighed and shrugged helplessly. "I've learned it's easier to just smile and nod sometimes."

"Tch. If I have to go on another date with you, I swear, I'll chop her head off."

"Oh, no, don't worry. I'll just cut her off from dango," Iruka replied, hiding the painful twinge he'd felt at the other man's statement. "When she starts going through withdrawals, she'll do anything I say."

Kakashi grumbled that chopping her head off would be much more satisfying, but then the brunet had replied that after a few hours, watching Anko get twitchy was actually quite satisfactory, and when she started shaking was just amusing.

They made another date so Iruka could tell him in detail the stages Anko went through for withdrawals, and then another to talk about ways to outwit her and be gone before she ever found her target, and yet another to discuss which parts of Naruto's retelling of their missions were true. …Kakashi would worry about the other dates as they came.

Only when Anko caught them in bed together and declared that she and Iruka would be each other's Maids of Honor did Kakashi truly understand just how… _different_ their relationship was.


End file.
